Namida
by Moonlight-Yume-Charlotte
Summary: The Anbu are busy so Kakashi and some other ex anbu are rounded up to take on a mission but why does "Namida" look so familiar? Will his discovery bring them closer together or tear them apart for good? x Sorry Suck at summaries **Sweatdrops** Just read!


Charlotte: Hello people! I'm so sorry for the delay but my mother decided to extend our holiday and then my sister cut half my hair off and my...

Kakashi: Stop rambling and get to the stories!

Charlotte: *Huff* Anyway, I did get a few ideas on holiday and i wrote them down, I have a few one shots and three shots and I have been brainstorming for my chaptered stories so watch out for them coming soon. I will upload quite a few little story ideas i think ^_^

Iruka: Disclaimer: Charlotte doesn't own Naruto etc etc but she does own Ryouga, Kagura and Namida(the nonIru part).

**Bold is flashback x**

* * *

_Attend a meeting at the Hokage's tower at 0500 tomorrow morning._

_Anbu are busy on another S rank so I need you to take a mission._

_Don't be late brat._

This is the note that Kakashi found pinned to his window as he returned from Ichikaru's with Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura and Lee. Sakura and Lee had got together not long after Lee's fight with Gaara and when Sasuke returned at the age of 17 with both Orochimaru and Itachi's heads in his hands. This got him a pardon from Tsunade with the help of Team 7's begging and now he had to be escorted for 2 years by at least one member of anbu.

Kakashi used his experience as an anbu to escort Sasuke as much as possible, this meant that Sasuke wasn't feeling aggravated or uneasy when a new member would turn up for watch.

Naruto stood at 6ft tall with his stunning blue eyes shining brighter then before, his tanned skin shone like an adonis. Sasuke was often found scowling when he stood next to the kyubi container. Sasuke had only grown to 5,8 and Naruto loved to remind him at any opportunity, his features still delicate and feminine. Sakura's hair had grown and she wore it back in a bun with chopsticks and she openly displayed a flashy engagement ring on her finger.

_**Sasuke's dark eyes darted about before Kakashi placed a warm hand on his shoulder. **_

"_**While you are with me, the anbu won't bother you. Besides most of the anbu are away on a mission," Kakashi reassured and Sasuke's posture settled slightly.**_

"_**Being around Orochimaru, I had to keep my guard up," Sasuke sneered but Kakashi could read between the lines easily.**_

"_**Your welcome," Kakashi replied and he waved the blonde, pinkette and bowlhead over. Naruto slid onto the stool beside Sasuke with a sunny smile.**_

"_**Sasuke," Naruto acknowledged with a nod and Sasuke hid a small quirk of his lips. Despite what both boys thought, it was apparent that they were together. They wouldn't go about holding hands or spewing lovey dovey remarks but you could tell by the subtle signs. Lee however spewed many compliments about his little cherry blossom much to Sakura's delight. **_

"_**Where's Iruka-sensei?" Kakashi said with a bored tone and Naruto brought his hand up to his chin.**_

"_**I think he said he had to see an important person, told me he's take me out for double ramen tomorrow," Naruto grinned and Sasuke watched his cool teacher carefully. Kakashi was a private person and only someone as private as he was could understand his feelings like an open book. Sasuke was that person and he could see the swirls of anxiety in his visible eye and the small crinkle in the mask showing a pout.**_

"_**Probably a date, He did say he was meeting a guy," Sasuke teased and Naruto looked shocked.**_

"_**No, he would have told me. He's not allowed to see someone without my approval," Naruto puffed out his chest and Sakura snorted.**_

_**As they said their goodbyes, Sasuke leaned in and began to whisper.**_

"_**You need to hide your feelings better," Sasuke said smugly and Kakashi frowned slightly.**_

"_**Don't forget protection Sasuke, we don't need you giving birth to little blonde bundles of energy," Kakashi teased and Sasuke's eyes widened a fraction before his mask was in place. **_

"_**Hn," He walked off without another word and left Kakashi to his thoughts.**_

Kakashi took the note of the glass and folded it carefully, he dodged his traps and strolled into the kitchen to make some tea. He missed Iruka's company, Kakashi had realized years ago that he was interested in the innocent chunin. His sunny disposition burned through Kakashi's cold exterior, his passionate anger enthralled the genius and his caring nature made Iruka completely foreign to Kakashi. Being a chunin, Kakashi wasn't worried about dangerous missions or vendettas. Mizuki was safely locked away in the Konoha's most dangerous prison, Iruka even visited him at least once a month.

Kakashi had been tempted to reveal his feelings but that would make him vulnerable and vulnerable was something Kakashi didn't do. Iruka showed care to everyone so it was hard to tell what came from romantic feelings and what came from natural kindness.

Kakashi looked confusedly at the note again, something deep in his genius mind he could feel something was off about the meeting.

* * *

Waking up at 4 am wasn't a problem for Kakashi but his dogs loved be 'helpful' to their master. At 3:57 a.m his dogs jumped onto the bed and began barking annoyingly in the jounin's ear, Kakashi wanted to hit them off the bed for their cheek but he would never hurt them. He readied his equipment and headed out for the tower with Pakkun in tow.

In Kakashi's opinion the Hokage's tower looked so much better in the dark, when the sky grew dark enough special chakra lights would shine. Blues and reds of lights strung along the edges and it illuminated the small streets below. He saw the Hokage's assistant Shizune walking the opposite way and he raised an eyebrow.

"I need to get some scrolls for your mission, please head for Tsunade-hime's office," She said seriously and with a bow she continued on her way. He left Pakkun outside the office and he pushed the door.

The Hokage's office was small and cosy with a large mahogany desk in the center, small plants were scattered around the room and random scrolls were thrown about the furniture.

'She doesn't like plants…. Probably more places to hide her Sake,' Kakashi thought bitterly and as if reading his mind Tsunade gave a cheshire cat grin.

"Did you see Shizune leave this section of the building?" Tsunade asked and Kakashi nodded briefly. She smirked and pointed to a nearby leafy plant.

"Pass me my sake, it's behind the Phil the fern," she said and Kakashi handed her the drink with a sneer.

"Mr Ukki is cuter," He said and Tsunade thought a moment before nodding.

"Yes but Phil has a kind of sophistication about him," She concluded. Kakashi dropped into the chair in front of the desk and pulled his book out. She twitched her eye and cleared her throat.

"I'll invite the other members in to meet you two," Tsunade said smugly and Kakashi looked surprised. He looked to the back right corner of the room and finally saw a figure standing there, the man was decked out in anbu uniform.

A white vest top with a blood red scarf, navy trousers with navy elbow length gloves. This anbu uniform was slightly different, it covered all traces of skin by covering the shoulders with a red stretchy cape.

He wore a white mask with 3 silver claw marks across the mask, the mask had a dark material around the back that shielded the hair from view.

The door opened and two people walked in and stood either side of Kakashi, he took in the appearance but couldn't keep the fourth member of the team.

The first man wore a simple jounin uniform, he had fire red hair that was tied back in a long plait down his back. He had a small goatee and wore an unreadable expression. Kakashi's eyes trailed down his arm until he saw a metal hand where his left hand should have been.

He turned to the others with a quick wave of his metal hand.

"I'm Ryouga Minatori, I just got back from a 3 year mission in Suna," He said loudly and Kakashi studied him carefully.

'Not wearing anbu, so he must be an ex-anbu like me and he was sent away on a long mission which means he has a special expertice,' He thought and he looked at the blonde woman on his right.

The woman was taller then him and had blonde hair in short pigtails. She wore an red kimono with sparrows on it and matching red lipstick. The woman fit the category 'Femme Fatale' far too well to be any good.

'She isn't brunette enough and too busty and she doesn't have a cute scar over her nose,' Kakashi thought as the woman winked shamelessly at him.

"I'm Kagura Youkai, anbu for Rain and visiting Konoha for this mission," She said proudly and Kakashi nodded in acknowledgement.

'She's from rain, no wonder I didn't recognise her,' Kakashi thought and all 3 turned towards the mysterious figure. Tsunade cleared her throat and she moved to stand beside the masked figure.

"Please call this member of your team Namida, being a former anbu isn't something Namida has made public and doesn't want his normal life affected by this," Tsunade said sternly and everyone nodded.

"The mission…. I would usually get the acting anbu to take care of it but they are otherwise occupied. Rain has provided us with Kagura-san because on the border of our nations there is a group that if left unchecked could rivals akatsuki. There numbers aren't large but they are skilled," She said locking her fingers together in worry.

"Rivals the Akatsuki, but Akatsuki are dead except Sasori and Deidara," Ryouga exclaimed and Kakashi looked deep in thought.

Sasori had fought with Pein and decided he was leaving, however the others in Akatsuki wouldn't let him go. Deidara was adamant his danna wasn't leaving without him and they became watched to prevent them leaving. So he and his boyfriend came up with an idea to fake their deaths to avoid them, Deidara ended up confiding in Naruto when the Kyubi boy found them hiding out.

In the forbidden scrolls they found a way to restore Sasori to his human form and both ninja's pledged to fight for Konoha. Sasori and Sasuke became good friends as they found they had more in common then both having hyperactive blonde boyfriends with blue eyes.

"They are relatively weak but I hear one of Orochimaru's associates is scouting them out. If they are allowed to join then it could be….. Unpleasant," Tsunade growled .

"I want this mission to be completed efficiently, it will take 2 days to get to the border and I expect you back in a week or I will send reinforcements," Tsunade said as she began downing her sake. Namida stepped forward and picked up a pen, he pulled out a bit of spare parchment and began to write.

WHO WILL REINFORCEMENTS BE IF THE ORIGINAL ANBU ARE STILL BUSY?

Kakashi frowned at the script, Namida was smart enough to write in capitals so they couldn't recognise the handwriting. Tsunade put her bottle down reluctantly and addressed the man.

"I will send the jounin after you, but I have no doubt in your abilities and when you have these 3 on your team it can only go well," She clarified and Kakashi felt insulted.

'She has a lot of faith in his abilities, He must have some skills,' Kakashi wondered and Namida nodded. The other two fled out of the room leaving the door open, Pakkun trotted in and froze at the man. Tsunade could see an issue and she called Kakashi forward.

"Kakashi, I must give you more details. You will be team leader, Namida will you take Pakkun to get some steak," She said quickly and Namida picked the dog up and fled the room. Kakashi snarled slightly at another holding one of his dogs but Tsunade clicked her fingers.

"Listen, here's the plan….." She began stalling.

* * *

Namida placed the pug down and stood back as he tried to bite at the gloved hand. Pakkun growled angrily and Namida held up his hands in apology. He looked around shiftily and seeing the coast was clear, he pulled the mask off with a large breath. The dark hair looked ruffled but stayed in his ponytail. He rubbed his scar and looked down at the small dog.

"I'm sorry I picked you up Pakkun but my identity has to remain annonymous, I will treat you to steak," He said in a hushed tone and Pakkun tried not to be distracted by the promise of meat.

"What are you doing on an anbu mission?" He said gruffly and Iruka sighed.

"I did used to be an anbu and jounin but Sarutobi-sama thought it would be best if I kept my status a secret. I enjoyed being a chunin teacher and I didn't want to be constantly sent on missions," Iruka said quietly and Pakkun looked confused.

'I know he's a good teacher and his students and colleges love him but I thought he would want to be out there and protect the village,' Pakkun thought. Iruka felt sick, he had forgotten about the nin-dogs ability to remember scents, he knew Kakashi had a good sense of smell but he was wearing a cologne to disguise it. But nothing fools Pakkun's nose.

"It's a psychological thing, when I put on the uniform I can kill dozens of people but when the mask comes off I feel guilt beyond anything you can imagine. It was destroying me so I quit anbu and returned to being me full time," Iruka said sadly and Pakkun nodded understandingly. Kakashi seemed like a serious guy all the time even though he had his childlike moments but when he was anbu…. Kakashi was unrelenting and would kill the target and anyone he could find.

"So I'm assuming you don't want me to say anything?" Pakkun said and Iruka clasped his hands together to plead.

"Please? The thing is…. I don't mind Ryouga-san or Kagura-san knowing but….. Kakashi can't know. We are friends and I'm worried he would be angry that I kept this side from him. The happy, caring chunin he knows is the real me but everyone has a dark side," Iruka stuttered and Pakkun looked at the embarrassed chunin with a smile.

'He'll make a good mate for the boss,' He thought fondly and he coughed loudly.

"I won't say anything….. Now about steak…." Pakkun grinned and Iruka rolled his eyes.

"Okay….. But I have to put the mask back on so don't expect a good conversation," Iruka warned but Pakkun had already begun moving, Iruka looked at the mask with a mix of sorrow and rage as he slipped it on.

* * *

Kakashi sat on a small black chair on his balcony and sighed against the cold morning air. They had all been given 2 hours to change into their uniforms, get their masks (find their masks in Kakashi's case) and meet back at the gate.

"Part of me misses this uniform," Kakashi said and Pakkun snorted behind him. Kakashi looked over his shoulder at the dog.

"You took your time, enjoy your steak," Kakashi said suspiciously and the pug glared at him.

"Namida treated me to 2 steaks, you can't like wearing the uniform," Pakkun said and Kakashi looked melancholy.

"It reminds me of the days where everything was simple, before I became attached to my team and before these feelings with Iruka happened," Kakashi said before he snapped up quickly.

"Iruka! I won't be able to see him before I go!" Kakashi whined and Pakkun nuzzled his hand in a gesture of comfort. A large blob of yellow fell into his vision, Kakashi grabbed a kunai and pressed it to the throat but he pulled it away.

"Naruto, you can't drop in on me and.." Kakashi began but Naruto ignored him.

"You'll treat me to ramen today won't you Kakashi-sensei? Iruka-sensei cancelled," Naruto pouted and Kakashi raised an eyebrow.

'That's two days in a row,' Kakashi thought but Naruto continued.

"Iruka-sensei said he couldn't come because he had to leave for a teaching course for an entire week!" Naruto exclaimed and Kakashi rubbed his temples at the noise. He could imagine the nosy neighbour waking up and having a fit at the noise.

'At least I'll be away so they can't complain my ears off,' Kakashi thought.

"I'm off on a mission and will be back in a few days," Kakashi explained and Naruto's eyes widened at the uniform.

"But that's..!" Naruto shouted but Kakashi covered his mouth with his hand. He leaned forwards and gave an intimidating glare.

"I know…. Not a word," Kakashi warned and Naruto nodded and ran off. Kakashi pulled the mask over his face and headed towards the meeting point.

* * *

The morning sun shone through the treetops and illuminated the 5 figures standing by the gate. The Hokage handed a scroll to Kakashi with a solemn look. Kagura had her hair tied back in a high ponytail and wore a mask of a spider web design. Ryouga wore a grey mask with long brown branches drawn across it. Namida stood facing away from the others and while Ryouga and Kagura double checked their bindings, Kakashi watched Namida closely.

'He holds good posture, smaller than me but that could contribute to his agility. Can't tell about skin tone between full body armour, gloves and mask and hair colour is unknown. His writing overall seemed polite so he must have been a good student at the academy, I'll continue to observe. Something intriguing is happening here,' Kakashi calculated. Without another word they all shot off into the forest, hopping from tree to tree. Kakashi and Namida took the lead and Kagura ran behind silently deciding who had the cuter ass.

They ran until the sun began to set and they set up camp in a small clearing, there were large trees shading the area and a small stream ran through the back corner.

Kagura scouted out the area before waving the men back. Silky strands erupted from her fingers, and decorated the trees and landscape around the camp. She lifted a hand to pull of her mask but Namida grabbed her arm to stop her.

"I know what I'm doing, these chakra webs will detect everything in the area so it's okay to remove the masks. I was taught by a legend in Rain and the Hokage gave me permission to use it so remove your masks," She ordered as she ripped the mask off her face. Ryouga nodded and pulled the mask off, he rubbed his beard to restore the shape. Kakashi was reluctant but he slowly lifted the mask off, Kagura sighed at Kakashi's face (still wearing his navy mask). Namida twitched slightly and Kakashi caught the action.

The fire was set and Kagura sat close to it as she maintained the chakra web, Kakashi sat on a low branch of a nearby tree and he watched Ryouga and Kagura subtlely flirt with Namida. Ryouga edged closer to the still masked man, whose body language seemed uncomfortable.

"So Namida, I understand you like privacy but if team mates don't trust each other then it can cost a mission," Ryouga scolded playfully and Kakashi felt a strange bubbling in his gut.

'There is something about him that doesn't add up,' Kakashi thought as Namida scribbled on a bit of paper.

"It's not that I don't trust you, it's protecting the people I care about," Ryouga read out loud and Kagura nodded dreamily.

"How honourable, so Namida do you have someone special waiting for you at home?" She flirted and Namida raised a hand and waved it slightly. He took the paper back and wrote quickly again. This time Kagura read it.

"No, I have someone I'm interested in but they are out of my league. I help look after a teenage boy that I've known since he was a baby, he's somewhat of a son to me," She read and she squealed out of joy.

"You are so sweet, looking after a little orphan and protecting him. But I don't get about this love interest…. You are an elite anbu, there aren't many that are out of your league," She said thinking animatedly. Kakashi thought back to one time he was flirting with Iruka.

**Flashback**

**"Kakashi-sensei, you baka hentai!" Iruka blushed and Naruto laughed at the shade of red his teacher turned. Naruto collected two ramen and brought them over to a near comatose Sasuke, Sasuke looked up at the blonde like a lost puppy before dropping his gaze to his lap.**

**"Maa Iruka-sensei, you know we look good together," Kakashi teased and Iruka laughed and shook his head. Iruka looked sad for a moment before he laughed and hit Kakashi's arm.**

**"Yeah the great Sharingan Kakashi, The Copy nin with a lowly chunin school teacher. Ha! You know you're way out of my league Kakashi," Iruka stuck his tongue out and hoped Kakashi couldn't see the slight hurt in his large doe like eyes.**

**Flashback ends**

'He's like Iruka, I hope it works out for him. Maybe that's why I feel drawn to him, he's like Iruka,' Kakashi pondered and Kagura let out a long yawn.

"I'm able to maintain the chakra while I sleep so I'm going to turn in," She announced and she batted her eyelashes towards Kakashi. Kakashi resisted the urge to retch at her, Ryouga patted Namida on the shoulder and retired to his own tent. Kakashi waited 10 minutes until he heard the soft breathing of Ryouga and loud purrs of Kagura. He jumped down and sat next to the somewhat relaxed man.

"I think I understand you know," Kakashi said suddenly, Namida put the paper on the floor between them. He took the pen delicately between his gloved fingers and began drawing.

WHAT DO YOU UNDERSTAND?

"I felt drawn to you but I know why know why. You remind me of someone important to me" Kakashi said openly and Iruka gulped beneath the mask.

WHO? YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I LOOK LIKE SO HOW CAN I REMIND YOU OF ANYONE?

"I can't say but he always puts himself down but he's more worthy then anyone else," Kakashi said and Iruka looked up at Kakashi with a confused expression, not that he could see.

DO YOU CARE ABOUT HIM?

"Yeah, he's my first friend in years…" Kakashi said but his private side kicked in. He kept silent and Iruka sighed and scribbled.

YOU SHOULD TELL HIM BEFORE YOU LOSE HIM, GOODNIGHT HATAKE.

Iruka stood up, bowed low and rushed into his tent. Kakashi sat back and watched the fires smoulder and spit sparks. He looked at the written side of the conversation and tucked it away in a pocket.

'Why did I say so much, maybe I'm just missing Iruka. I can't really deny things anymore,' Kakashi thought solemnly, completely unaware of the turmoil Iruka was surrounded in.

'His first friend… I feel so honoured but at the same time…. Why am I so selfish!… I want more… I shouldn't, he's….. Him and I'm…. Me..' Iruka thought and he pressed his bare face into the soft pillow.

* * *

Kakashi was shaken awake by an enthusiastic woman in a spider mask.

"Come on, breakfast and then we hit the road," She said happily and Kakashi scolded himself for not sensing her. Namida turned the meat on the metal spike over the fire, he turned them perfectly and Ryouga couldn't help compliment him.

"Wow you really know how to cook, must be a hit with the ladies. Strong ninja, Good father, Good cook, Good looking?" Ryouga hinted and Iruka picked up a nearby twig and drew in the mud.

MATTER OF OPINION

Kakashi smirked under his mask but curiosity bubbled in his brain, he observed he mysterious man.

'Is this what people think about my mask, I can't blame them for trying if it is,' Kakashi pouted.

That night they were perched in a tree outside a small raggedy shack, everyone was silent as they tracked the chakra inside.

"7, jounin level, we can take them," Ryouga whispered and Namida pulled out a small knife, he carved his message into the bark.

SHOULD WE KEEP ONE FOR INTERROGATION?

Kakashi shook his head, Namida scored the message out and Kakashi raised three fingers and counted down. The ninja burst from the shack and the anbu set to work.

Kakashi leapt down and dashed towards a ninja and and charged him, he slid between the legs and dug a kunai into the back of the ninja's leg. The man screamed in pain before attempting to kick the copy-nin, Kakashi gathered his chakra and hit a blow to his back, killing the man on impact.

Ryouga ripped the sleeve of his arm and in a flash of light it became a large pointed spear. He disappeared behind two ninjas and jabbed one in the neck, the other whirled round and caught Ryouga unguarded with a chakra punch that threw him back a few meters. Ryouga sprang back and sliced the man's arm off.

Kagura shot poisonous webs at her victim and watched him disintegrate into dust. She kicked Ryouga's man in the back of the head and sliced his neck. Kakashi looked around and caught a small glint of light in the trees. He threw a Shuriken towards it and heard a small cry of pain, a female ninja dropped down with a crossbow in her hand. Bolts were shot towards the three, they dodged easily and the woman was wound in a cocoon and crushed. They sensed Namida's chakra and ran towards it.

Namida worked ruthlessly, he got rid of the first man easily - drawing him towards a nearby cliff face and smashing the man's brain across the rocks. He drew a short katanna and began a fight with the masked woman. She had gloves with 3 barbed hooks and used it to deflect the hits. Kakashi, Ryouga and Kagura hid in the shadows and watched the man work.

'The movements are fluid, the hits precise and the execution overall is almost perfect. Why would he quit anbu, why would anbu let him quit?' Kakashi watched and he heard a small gasp from Kagura.

Namida knocked the barbs off and sliced cleanly through the woman's neck, beheading her cleanly. The head rolled across the grassy plain leaving a trail of scarlet, Namida's uniform and mask was splattered with spots of blood. The masked man stood above the headless body and didn't move an inch, his neck snapped up towards his team. Even though they couldn't see Namida's eyes they could all imagine the cold gaze that would make them shiver.

* * *

Kagura sat beside Ryouga at the camp but neither said a word. Kagura silently wound some bandages around the bruised ribs of Ryouga. Kakashi stood atop a branch and looked at Namida. Namida was crouched by a spring of water and he just stared aimlessly into the water, Kakashi found after an hour of this that he was bored.

"Aren't you going to wash the blood off?" Kakashi said loudly but Namida didn't jump. He took a pen and some paper out of his pocket and lay it on the ground next to him. Kakashi was beside him in an instant.

MISSION ISN'T OVER, THERE IS STILL A CHANCE THAT WE WILL HAVE TO KILL AGAIN.

Kakashi raised an eyebrow and sat down next to Namida, he reached a hand out to touch his shoulder but the masked ninja flinched.

I CAN'T CLEAN THE BLOOD OFF KNOWING I WILL JUST END UP COVERED IN BLOOD AGAIN.

Kakashi felt something he didn't from Namida, a deep caring hidden by the mask and Kakashi had never wanted to unmask someone so much in his entire life. His hand landed against the covered shoulder and he could feel the warmth beneath it.

"Why did you quit anbu? Did you even get the tattoo?" Kakashi said softly and Namida nodded.

I WAS WEAK, NOT PHYSICALLY BUT MENTALLY. I DON'T LIKE TO KILL, THE PART OF ME WEARING THIS UNIFORM IS A PART I LOCKED AWAY AND NEVER WANTED TO SEE.

Kakashi's fingers itched to rip the mask from his face, the suspense was killing him. His fingers trailed down the shoulder and Namida tensed.

"Not many ninjas have that thought length, you must work with helping people. The hospital? The academy?" Kakashi asked but the pen was thrown aside and Namida stood trembling slightly. He shook his head slowly before running back to camp leaving Kakashi confused and slightly annoyed. He ignored the two confused looks and dove under his sleeping bag, tearing the mask from his face.

'He can't know! He'll hate me, there is no chance he would love me back if he knew!' Iruka thought sadly and his fingers clenched in the pillow.

'There's no chance he likes someone like me anyway,' Iruka thought. He could hear Kakashi's steps outside his tent and he held his breath until they passed. He could still smell the blood on his clothes and he fought not to gag.

* * *

They arrived back in Konoha as the evening drew in, the faint outline of stars in the orange skies.

Kakashi handed the report to Tsunade with a sneer, she used the hand not holding a sake bottle to accept it. She grinned happily and hiccuped. Shizune snatched both the bottle and the report from her mentor and went to file the report.

"Well done, Anbu are back so you all are dismissed," She said finally and the captain of the anbu strolled in. He wasn't wearing his mask, he had short black hair and wore a smug sneer. Kakashi hated the man with a passion, as anbu they were rivals and Kakashi was far better but decided anbu wasn't for him. So his rival became captain much to Kakashi's annoyance.

"Captain Onigiri, here is the report," Shizune offered and the man took it with a wink. He looked at Kakashi with disdain.

"Hatake," He said and Kakashi raised to his full height to tower over the man.

"Onigiri," Kakashi said coldly and the others made to leave the room but Onigiri gasped in happy surprise.

"I…. It's been a long time," He said respectfully to Namida and the man nodded in response. Kakashi felt his visible eye narrowing at the exchange. Ryouga and Kagura exited quickly and Namida made to leave but Onigiri caught his arm.

"Dinner tonight? Without the mask, I've missed your face," Onigiri said lowly and Kakashi could feel envy running through his veins.

'Wait? Onigiri is anbu captain, one of the few above him, does that mean Namida likes…' Kakashi studied but Namida wretched the hand of him gently with a pat. He pulled a pen from Tsunade's desk and wrote on a piece of paper.

SORRY, I'M BUSY.

Kakashi chuckled at the refusal and Onigiri glared icily.

"You sure? You know you should come back to anbu, you could have my job," He joked and Namida put both hands on his hips and shook his head rapidly.

"I don't approve of the image you've gone for, wasting your abilities on children and…" Onigiri ranted and Namida pinned him to the wall by his neck with a hand over his mouth. He removed the hand slowly and wrote on Onigiri's arm.

YOU'RE FIRST AND ONLY WARNING!

Onigiri looked at the mask before nodding and leaving the room with the report, Kakashi smiled after the man until he saw Namida facing him. If he could have seen past the mask, he would have seen apprehension and worry over Kakashi discovering him.

Namida bowed low and he fled the room, Kakashi tried to process the information but watching an old rival getting beaten was distracting him. Tsunade watched with intent before an amused smile came over her tipsy face.

"You should tail Namida, you might find out something interesting," She said happily and Kakashi looked at her with mock shock.

"Why? Is the Hokage of our honored village telling me to stalk another shinobi, what kind of example is that," He winked (or blinked, with one eye you can't tell).

"I know you want to go see Iruka but tail Namida first," She teased and Kakashi went slightly red under his mask.

"I don't know what you're talking about," He said trying to act like he didn't care. Tsunade's eyebrow wrinkled and she stood up in fury.

"SHUT UP BRAT! Everyone knows you like him except him, just follow Namida and snap to it!" She roared and Kakashi was out the window and gone.

* * *

Namida dashed for his apartment, this whole disguise thing was grating on his sanity.

'I just need to get home and wash the blood off, cry out of guilt for an hour or two, pray for whomever I've killed to have a happy afterlife and after that I might go to the monument to apologise to my parents,' Iruka thought hurriedly and he was so distracted he couldn't sense the jounin following him.

'Where is he going, he's heading for….. No…,' Kakashi thought as the pieces fell into place. He followed carefully, he couldn't afford to be caught.

Namida placed his hand on the wall outside his window, he let a pulse of chakra go and the window slid open with the traps disabled. Kakashi begged every deity that he was wrong, that Namida was going into Iruka's apartment because they were friends and not…

Iruka pulled the mask off and looked at it with hatred, he traced the claw marks and sighed at the blood. He ran the tap to the kitchen sink and dropped the mask into the warm water, he pulled the uniform off and dropped them in as well. He poured soap in and stirred it before moving to the bathroom. He started the shower and stepped under the hot water, he let the water boil the kinks out of his back and he let him mind drift to the mission.

Kakashi could hear the shower running as he sat on the roof of Iruka's home.

'He couldn't be Namida, Iruka is innocent, sweet and pure….. He couldn't….' Kakashi thought confusedly. He heard the shower turn off and he peered in. Iruka brushed his hair through and he grabbed a robe. He walked out with his shoulders hunched painfully, the flashes of the mission bombarded his brain and he sunk down onto the couch. Tears ran from large chocolate coloured eyes and Kakashi bit his lip to stop himself comforting the chunin.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I hope the afterlife is better for you two. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm a monster, I'm a monster…. How can I teach knowing what I've done….. I don't deserve… Naruto….. Sasuke… Kakashi…." Iruka mumbled through his sobs. Iruka looked at the kitchen clock and sighed.

"It's 7:25…. At 8 I'll visit mother and father," Iruka mourned and Kakashi checked the watch on his wrist.

'I'll confront him then, he needs to get this out of his system….. ' Kakashi thought and he disappeared into smoke.

* * *

Being a genius made Kakashi aware of two things; 1) Iruka was Namida and 2) Pakkun should have smelled it.

He pulled both masks off his face and glared angriliy at the wall, his sharingan eye remained closed. He bit into his thumb harder then he probably should have and a small pug appeared.

"Namida," Kakashi snapped and Pakkun recoiled slightly, when the alpha of a pack was angry then it meant trouble for the entire pack.

"You know the truth then?" Pakkun said and Kakashi's eyes widened.

"You knew from the beginning it was Iruka?" Kakashi said and Pakkun nodded.

"From when we met him, he begged me not to tell you. He said something about not wanting you to know the darkness in him, he wants you to know the real him not what anbu made him," Pakkun confessed and Kakashi felt the anger flooding out of him.

"Even now, he always puts others before him. Namida is a cold anbu killer but Iruka is warm and full of life. Every one has a dark side but I always wanted to protect him from it, but he already discovered it and wanted to protect _me_ from it," Kakashi snarled and he ran his fingers through his hair. Pakkun's ears drooped and he nuzzled the tense hand gently.

"I must love him, nothing has changed. But I'll do anything to make sure Namida never comes back, I want to keep Iruka who is he is forever, I want to stay by Iruka's side not Namida's," Kakashi declared and Pakkun looked at his master with affection.

"Go for it boss," He smiled.

* * *

Iruka stood before the large memorial stone with a sobre expression, his eyes were dark with thought.

'I'm still in mission mode, I need to calm down. I'm safe,' Iruka thought irritably as he traced his parents names.

"I miss you, if you were here you would know what to say," Iruka smiled and a single tear escaped. He could feel a familiar chakra and he didn't know whether to be happy or sad.

Kakashi stood next to him with a curious look.

"Kakashi, sorry I didn't say goodbye I had this teaching thing… hope you haven't been too bored without me," Iruka teased but Kakashi's expression didn't change.

"I was sent on a mission," Kakashi said simply and Iruka's eyes widened.

"If it was high class you shouldn't tell me anything, are you okay? Got any injuries?" Iruka asked and Kakashi was tempted to yell.

"No, it went okay. What did you learn at the teaching thing?" Kakashi said slyly and Iruka's eyes widened slightly.

"This and that," Iruka said shuffling his feet into the soft dirt, Kakashi watched the nervous reaction with slight awe at the cuteness.

"Iruka," Kakashi said and Iruka looked into the blue eye. Even though they hadn't left each others side the felt like they had been apart weeks. Kakashi pulled the chunin closer with a squeak from the brunette.

"I'm tired of secrets, I like you no I more then like you," Kakashi said and Iruka's mouth dropped open. He looked like a scared child and his voice wouldn't escape his throat.

"Kakashi, I feel the same," Iruka whispered and Kakashi's face erupted in a relieved grin. He held the smaller man close and inhaled the sweet scent of Iruka, he felt hesitant hands on his arms. Iruka pulled away and looked back towards the stone.

'Should I tell him? No, he likes this me not that horrible person,' Iruka reasoned but when he looked back he saw something. A glint in Kakashi's eye, not the glint that showed love or care but one that showed knowledge. Understanding hit Iruka like a lightning bolt.

"You know," Iruka said sullenly, his shoulders dropped and his eyes fell shut in pain.

"I followed you home, I saw you crying," Kakashi clarified and Iruka's head snapped up.

"I'm sorry…. I…. don't know what to say," Iruka said honestly and he could still feel Kakashi's gaze on him.

"It doesn't change anything, I understand….. I still love you," Kakashi said and Iruka gasped.

"You can't…. I'm a killer…. A monster…" Iruka rambled but Kakashi grabbed both shoulders with his hands and shook him.

"You only did what I have to do every mission, I kill… I'm the monster," Kakashi yelled and Iruka slapped his chest repeatedly.

"You're not, you're not! You're Kakashi! You only do what you have to!" Iruka sobbed and Kakashi lifted his chin up.

"So did you, you had to kill them to protect Konoha and you were heartbroken after it. I've never seen anyone with more remorse for a dangerous stranger than you," Iruka absorbed these words in and took a deep breath.

"You don't care? That I was anbu or that I lied?" Iruka asked and Kakashi petted his cheek soothingly.

"No I don't care, I just want to be with you with no more secrets. But I need you to promise me something…." Kakashi said slowly and Iruka nodded.

"You want Namida to disappear…. For good?" Iruka said shyly and Kakashi nodded. Iruka rested his head against the jounin's strong shoulder and nuzzled it.

"Okay, for you but you'll have to tell Tsunade-hime," Iruka said but Kakashi remained stony.

"I want to see it, it's not that I don't trust you but….you need the support," Kakashi reassured and Iruka smiled happily.

"Thank you Kakashi, I love you," Iruka mumbled and Kakashi leaned down and gave Iruka a clothed kiss.

'It's strange to kiss through a mask but not unpleasant,' Iruka thought hazily.

"I love you too, Tonight, Midnight on your roof," Kakashi said before disappearing in a puff of smoke. Iruka stared at where his boyfriend had stood and sighed contentedly.

'I'm not a monster, he isn't either. The only thing stopping us becoming monsters is each other,' Iruka thought as he bowed to the memorial stone.

* * *

Iruka pulled his now dry anbu costume on, he took the shoulder cape off it because it didn't matter anymore. He also took the back off the mask and made sure to leave his hair down. He held his mask tightly in his grip, looked into the mirror and held back tears.

'I've always hated this cold part of me, getting rid is a good thing. I still have the powerful warm fighter in me to protect Konoha and my students as a chunin,' that was Iruka's last thought before the mask was secured tightly.

The metal stairs to the roof never felt so long for him, he looked up at the clear sky. Stars dotted around occasionally and a large full moon lit up the dark sky. Kakashi stood in his anbu outfit with an intense gaze, his silver hair illuminated by the moonlight. Iruka stepped forwards and a hand reached up and rested against his own cheek.

"Ready Namida?" Kakashi said coldly and the anbu nodded, the hand curled around the edge and the mask was peeled back. Iruka's cold eyes emerged and his grip tightened as Kakashi held out a hand.

"I don't think I'm strong enough," Iruka whispered and Kakashi tugged down his cloth mask. Iruka stared up in awe at the handsome features of the copy-nin.

'Most handsome man in the world,' Iruka thought dreamily and this thought loosened his hand.

"That's why I'm here," He replied and Iruka looked at the mask, he kissed the forehead and handed it over. Kakashi stood back, he raised a hand to gather blue energy.

"CHIDORI!" He yelled and the mask was shattered into billions of pieces. He looked up and saw a beautiful sight, his Iruka wearing an anbu costume but his eyes were still warm.

His hair flickered behind him in the wind and his smile stretched across his face. Kakashi took in all the curves of Iruka's body and looked up with a perverted grin.

"You look hot in that outfit Iruka," He teased and Iruka's face turned red.

"Kakashi! Baka Hentai!" Iruka shouted and Kakashi wrapped his arms around the chunin. He tilted Iruka's chin up and looked for a signal in the coffee coloured eyes, Iruka nodded and Kakashi kissed him deeply. Their first unmasked kiss was perfect in both their eyes, warm lips against warm lips. Pulling apart they rested their foreheads against each other.

* * *

They were both in Iruka's living room drinking tea when Kakashi stood up.

"I'll leave now," Kakashi said nervously and Iruka looked startled.

"Y...You…. Don't have to…. If you don't..," Iruka stuttered and Kakashi smiled at his cute lover.

"My sensei is that an invitation into your bed? But it's only the first date," Kakashi joked and Iruka snarled like an animal.

"BAKA! Don't think because you're not wearing a mask that I won't hit you," Iruka growled and Kakashi laughed.

"Wouldn't dream of it sensei," Kakashi grinned and Iruka shuffled forwards.

"I just want you to stay… just….. Hold me?" Iruka mumbled and he covered his face in embarrassment the moment he said it. He was whisked off his feet and into Kakashi's arms before he could protest. Kakashi carried him to the bedroom and they both settled underneath the covers. Iruka yawned and snuggled closer to the large body in his bed.

"G'night Kashi, love you," Iruka yawned before falling straight asleep, Kakashi ran his fingers through the dark hair with a smile.

"Goodnight Ruka-koi, love you too," Kakashi said before joining his Iruka.

* * *

Charlotte: OKay this idea stemmed from a picture of Iruka in an anbu outfit and I was like :O omg awesome! And then my sister was like "Iruka is so weak" and I was determined to prove her wrong. I find a cute or devious Iruka is easier to write for me but I won't let him be called weak *pout*

PLease review!


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